Wednesday, August 26, 2015

"If It Wasn't For That One Thing..."

P"If it wasn't for that one thing..."

The wife and I find ourselves saying that phrase a lot lately. 

"If it wasn't for that one thing...."

We try to give our son Kyle more independence as he gets older.

The independence we are striving for is partially to make him a better, more self-sufficient person and partially, selfishly to make our job as parents easier. 

And things that used to be difficult years ago for many different reasons have now gotten easier. 

And we could almost let him have his complete independence in many situations "if it wasn't for that one thing"

Here's a few examples from the past few weeks. 

We went to an outdoor backyard party at another autism family's house a few weeks back. They have a ton of playground equipment in their backyard and wifey and I kept our distance and his Majesty was playing appropriately on their playground stuff for long periods of time. 



And wifey and I stayed on their deck quite far away and let him do his thing... I actually had a beer!  And all was kinda right with the world... "if it wasn't for that one thing" 

He kept trying to eat the playground chips on the floor of their playground. 


This playground had those chips made of those recycled tires. 

Then we went to the Jersey shore a few times this summer and went to the beach and the king had a grand old time and we could sit in our seats and leave him be for the most part "if it wasn't for that one thing" ...he was throwing sand. 

In the past he would pick up sand and drop it over and over and over which we learned to live with but this year he decided that he wanted to throw the sand too.  So anytime he got anywhere near another human being wifey or I had to intercede and redirect him. 


And then we come up to our upstate NY Lake vacation and we check into our room and he's acting quite independently and he's quite self-sufficient bouncing on his ball and choosing  videos on iPad. So independent, that wifey and I think we have the time to leave him be and unpack for the week. And "if it wasn't for that one thing" we could've done that. 

The one thing here was just putting all the nastiest stuff in his mouth. The few things with the most germs that you wouldn't want your kids to put in their mouth from a hotel room. 


The remote control, the telephone, the room key, the couch cushions.

And then we go down to the lake, the lake we've been coming to every year, and yay he's not throwing sand here... 

We can leave him be and let him do his usual sand stim on the lip of the water.  We can sit and not pester our 12 year old son every 15 seconds..."if it wasn't for that one thing"...

This year, for the first year ever, he discovered the rocks in the lake. He wants to throw them, and eat them!

So every 25 seconds it's "put the rock down buddy",  "don't throw the rock buddy",  "not in your mouth buddy"

Those are the 4 examples that I remembered but there's tons more. I feel like we are always saying "if it wasn't for that one thing" lately.  

And don't get me wrong, this whole idea of "if it wasn't for that one thing" can be viewed as a positive. 

In many of those situations there used to be 10 things. And now based on Kyle maturing some and wifey and I maturing some and learning not to sweat the small stuff it's down to one thing. 

So going from 10 things down to one thing is a positive...

But boy oh boy if it wasn't for that one thing things would be so much easier!!!

:)

What are some of your "if it wasn't for that one thing" moments?

Friday, August 21, 2015

PICS of our planning / packing for a week's vacation... :)

We go to a lake town in upstate NY every August.  

We stay for 7-9 days and we stay at a hotel that gives us a full kitchen. 

So every year in the week leading up to our trip wifey uses our home office as her staging / packing area.  She uses the home office because we normally gate it off from Kyle and he doesn't normally care to go in there so she knows he won't mess with it

As you can imagine along with his clothes, she packs a TON of food and a TON of the king's toys, books, etc and of course his big green ball. 

Here's a pic of the staging area last August. This was taken 4 days before we left. 


And here's what the minivan looks like when it's all packed up. 


This pic was taken last august but it could have been any year. I take this pic every year before we depart and every year it looks almost identical. 

Anyway this year wifey couldn't use the
Home office as a staging area cuz Kyle was scheduled to have some therapy in there in the days leading up to our trip. 

So she found a great spot to store all the food stuffs that we are bringing. 


Looks innocent enough. But behind it lies a secret... A secret stash... 


She put a blanket over it and his majesty never discovered it. :)

And then for the rest of the stuff she has been using Kyle's bedroom as her staging area...



He literally only sleeps in there so it doesn't get in his way and he hasn't really messed with it. 

So that's it. I just wanted to show you how wifey does it cuz I find the whole thing fascinating and I'm living it so I thought maybe y'all would find it fascinating or at least interesting. 

and what my job you ask?  I have the most important job!  I packed my clothes and I pack and plan out all the Kings medicines for the week, 



and i pack and plan out all our electronics and chargers and adapters (iPads, laptops, DVDs, phone chargers, headphones, etc)


Plus i drive the 4 hours there and back. 

Basically i do all the daddy duties!

Anyway that's it. I thought some of you my find a slice of our lives interesting. 

We're off tomorrow!   Look for the 2015 picture of the minivan all packed up hopefully by about 11am. 


THE END 

Over and out!

:)

Saturday, August 15, 2015

VIDEO: Kyle Swinging, Bouncing, & Eating While Watching Music Videos





Saturday 11:39am -- Here's a quick video of my autistic son bouncing on his ball, swinging on his swing, while eating rice cakes. 

His autism service dog Paula is waiting for some crumbs to drop while the Black Eyed Peas play in the background






Friday, August 14, 2015

VIDEO -- Me Hiding Out in My Car Before Coming Home From Work



Here's a quick video blog post of me hiding out in my car before heading in to my crazy autism household on a Friday evening...



I explain why in the video...



ENJOY!











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Thursday, August 13, 2015

Kyle Didn't Get Into the School We Wanted for September :(

It's been a bit of a rough week over at the AD household. 

Kyle is 12 and was scheduled to switch schools in September since his old school only went up to "6th grade" 

However we weren't happy with the program that he was in so we didn't want to move him up to their middle school so we decided to look at other schools.

(I talked about some of this in a blog post last month at http://autism-daddy.blogspot.com/2015/07/can-we-get-some-good-news-we-could.html Read that for more of a backstory on the school situation)

And the school that we LOVED and were hoping to send Kyle to in September and is only 7 miles from our house is mired in a boatload of bureaucratic red tape with the state and so even though they have 10 slots available they are being told that they can't fill those 10 slots. 

It's way too complicated to explain why, but let's just say that it's not our school districts fault and it's not the schools fault and we've got lots of powerful people on our side...

And they all want him to attend there...but alas he can't right now... 

And there's nothing that can really be done right now. It's out of our hands...

So we had to settle on his "safety school" which is a 30 mile, over a bridge, 30 minute drive away...

So for the first time EVER we're going to have to put Kyle on the school bus each day.

And that is going to be a HUGE adjustment for all of us. And the king who likes to sleep late sometimes and sometimes has seizures in the mornings will have to get his butt up extra early to get on a school bus...

And don't get me wrong, this safety school really is a great school too...  it's just not as great as the other one and much further away and so much more of a life change and adjustment for all of us...

Big bummer!!

:(

I guess there's always the chance for a miracle, a Hail Mary that the slots at the great school close to our house will miraculously open up. So if you're the praying kind please pray and if you're the sending positive vibes kind (like I am) then please send positive vibes. 

However in the meantime we have to all prepare ourselves and wrap our heads around the idea that a few weeks from now Kyle will be taking a long bus ride each day...

:(

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